Feb 28 to March 2

Welcome! This is my first post. I'm using this blog as my diary from now on. I might would only share my stories a couple days a week, but I'll write everything I want for a whole week. Stay tuned!


Feb 28, 2019

I got up at 01.38 a.m. today, a little early compared to my usual routine. Excited for the drama, I feel happy for half the day ❤ But I started feeling nervous the moment we begin the drama. Holy shit. Well, I didn’t go as far as not being able to remember our theories at least. Btw, Mega forgot some of the dialog (so I need to improvise, too). Actually, I felt a little disappointed. I made the dialogs with some ice breaking so it’ll be fun to watch, but she forgot exactly the ice breaking. But it wasn’t too bad, we were able to deliver our theories at least. Ah! Mrs. Sara told us to write a journal –something like the analysis of our strong emotions or whatever- I wonder if I should write them in Indonesian or English (just like I usually do. This is my way of learning English, though). Oops, I forgot to remind Mrs. Sara to send us the ppts! And it’s already too late to ask for them right now.

I got a notification about earthquakes on the morning. I know I should be sad, but I just simply feel relieved for my leg’s recovery.

Dominant emotions: excited, nervous, relaxed, guilt

March 1, 2019

I got up at 01.51 a.m. today. My legs hurt, and the temperature was a little too low for me. So I decided to get back to sleep.

Mrs. Sara postponed the lecture for an hour, btw. I felt so grateful. I had to clean the bathrooms this morning, so I was I afraid I couldn’t attend her class. I still went there at the last moment, though. I decided to sit at the back to hide my pudency. I’d better not listen to my id next time.

Mum talked about her surgery at afternoon. I preferred listening to music instead of being all chatty with her. I just simply ignored her messages LOL. I'm sorry Frank*, I still look back with hate rather than sadness. I wish I'd be able to read your poem without feeling like a damned liar soon. I decided to listen to Gaho’s songs. They are literally my religion -I’m sorry VIXX, your songs are thrilling instead of relaxing- (the exaggeration LOL). They make me feel so calm whenever I listen to them ❤

I tried to look at Murray’s theory online. I wonder how did Kanisius made the book. I read such short and easy to understand articles online, but I felt troubled while reading the Kanisius version (it’s one of Mrs. Sara’s recommendations, though). Oh my, I forgot to mention her to send us those files! Better make reminders on my phone next time.

I’m up all night, waiting for my learning theory group to send their share of the work. I’ll be the one to make the power point. Challenging myself on things I used to avoid (because of my inferiority). I’m changing little by little, I guess. I wish I’d be able to go back to my old cheerful self soon. (I miss the old good times when my mum haven’t abused me, LOL).

It’s time to do my job. I learnt English because of comics and VIXX and I need to work hard from now on. It would be a shame for me to boast about VIXX when I’m lazy -because they always work hard-  ❤

Dominant emotions: relaxed, happy, unwilling, anger, guilt, a little annoyed

Notes:
*Frank Ochbery, M.D. Survivor Psalm

March 2, 2019

I was up till 10.30 a.m. today, so I decided to go to sleep. I slept for 4 hours so I can’t pray together with my friends. Nothing particular today, so I’m not gonna write anything I guess (but I wrote some sentences already LOL).

Dominant emotions: lazy